I need to adopt the fervent passion of the subscribers of the publication for which I am employed. I've recently decided that their earnest desire to make their points clear is going to inspire many of my English papers this year. Let me provide you with examples of said fervor, which are generally sprawled across the fronts of returned envelopes:
1. "Take me off your mailing list!!!! This publication is a cancer spreading throughout this land!!! You have many victims, including my mind!! AWAY WITH YOU!!" (Yes, written in all caps)
2. "EVERY TIME I GET THIS, IT GOES IN THE TRASH." (Also all caps)
3. "If I get one more of these, I will sue you for harassment in the court of small appeals in Louisiana!!!"
4. "I wouldn't give dogs crap for this!!"
However, we do have equally enthusiastic fanatics:
1. "Don't ever stop sending this!! I have friends who need my information to save them! They are DEMOCRATS!!!! They need our help."
Ok, so the enthusiasm doesn't run as thick with the lovers of the publication...or least the examples aren't as frequent. Or perhaps I simply enjoy reading the hate mail more, and subconsciously skip over the words of appreciation?
Actually, the more I consider it, the more I believe that to be the case. There really are copious amounts of letters of support and donations. After all, the publication is becoming increasing popular and is generally held in high regard, and duly (dewly...) so.
However, (in my best Flynn Rider voice...) guys, I want more hate mail!
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