My list of numeric equivalences for Facebook status likes, based on a conversation with my boyfriend:
Your significant other: 1 point. I mean, it's a given that they like you and how your brain works, right?
Someone you have literally never talked to in real life: 3 points. I mean, it's kind of up there, because it's cool that someone new likes your status, but it's still kind of creeperish, because they don't know you, so it can't be too high. But still very respectable. You have a bonding moment.
Someone who likes absolutely everything on facebook: 4 points. Maybe that seems high. But if you think it about, it means that your status is socially acceptable. If this person does not like your status, something is seriously wrong with you.
Someone of intimidating intellect: 6 points. Maybe you didn't mean to say something profound, but now a really smart person likes it so it must have been more awesome than you anticipated.
A professor or teacher: 10 points. This should be self-explanatory. Maybe it's my nerd side kicking in, but honestly, I think we all secretly like it when a professor likes our status.
Yourself: 0 points. It negates your status. Don't do it.
Someone who experienced with you whatever your status is about: 5 points. It legitimizes things.
Someone between the ages of 22 and 26: 7 points. It bolsters your self-esteem. Don't ask why; it just does. We all know it.
Someone artsy: 11 points. They have taste, so that means whatever you said is really good.
Any person of the opposite sex who is not related to you: 8 points. This is pretty decent. You know that they had to think about it first, because people worry about giving the wrong impression. So if they sat and thought about it and then decided it was worth liking, it's a good status.
So that is the list. Obviously this stuff really matters. Guys, think about how much your statuses are worth based on likes. Sometimes 5 likes can be worth more than 13. It's a weighted system.
Dewly noted.
